Original air date: November 19, 2009
Writer: Daniel J. Goor | Director: Greg Daniels
Summary: A HUNTING WE WILL GO—Leslie (Amy Poehler) tries to prove she can hang with the guys so she invites herself on Ron’s (Nick Offerman) annual hunting trip, but things don’t go as planned. Meanwhile, April (Aubrey Plaza) and Andy (Chris Pratt) bond in the office while everyone is away. Rashida Jones, Paul Schneider and Aziz Ansari also star.
Poll:
In a poll conducted on Knope Knows from November 19-29*, viewers gave “Hunting Trip” an 8.81/10.
*Typically, viewer polls go live immediately after a new episode airs on Thursday and run until Sunday evening. The poll for “Hunting Trip” was extended because I was unable to update in time.
Ratings:
4.613 million viewers | 2.0/6 A18-49 | Source
Quotes:
Andy: Piggyback. Piggyback. Move! Piggyback BAM! Piggyback BAM! Mark… Brendanawicz.
Councilman Houser: I’m running late.
Leslie: Oh, I’ll walk with you. See, the thing is when we allocate money for parks–
Ron: If you have any questions about the details, feel free to shoot me an e-mail.
Leslie: The only trails he’s going to be surveying are trails of lies and deception.
Tom: Not all the guys. He’s never taken me.
Leslie: Fine. All the men.
Leslie: Ron, let’s cut the bull. I want me, Tom and all the other ladies included on your hunting trip.
Leslie: You’re literally listening to turkey calls.
Ron: Is this–is this not rap?
Leslie: Come on.
Ron: And just like that. The one tiny aspect of government I enjoyed was clubbed to death before my eyes.
Leslie: Ann, you ready to bag some birds?
Ann: Nope. But I am ready to relax by the fire and get my real simple magazine on.
Leslie: Well if you change your mind, you’re now officially a licensed Indiana hunter.
Ann: Oh, gross.
Ann: Oh, it’s pretty! I thought it was going to be gross.
Leslie: I’m the pants queen!
Tom: What the hell?
Leslie: Bow to the pants queen.
Leslie: When you’re out with the boys you’ve gotta be ready for a good pantsing. That’s why I have suspenders that connect my bra to my jeans.
Tom: Ron P. Diddy Combs.
Ron: I would not have pegged you as a user of mouth tobacco.
Leslie: I’m full of surprises, Ron.
Ron: Rule #1, do not point the weapon at a person. That includes your own face, Donna.
Tom: Ron, your toast sucked.
Ron: The traditional toast is “to the hunt.” And, it is said by me.
Leslie: Oh, Ann, I always forget because you’re so pretty you’re not used to rejection.
Leslie: Alright, I hope you’re ready to discuss some college bowl game scenarios.
Leslie: (gobbles) Now here’s the female adolescent turkey (gobbles) Could you hear the difference?
Ron: No.
Leslie: Turkeys can.
Jerry: Bula-bula-bula!
Ron: Bula-bula-bula!
Mark: Bula-bula-bula!
Ron: We do that the first time one of us hits something.
Leslie: Oh, cool. Bula-bula-bula-bula–
Ron: No, no. You missed it.
Leslie: Look, Ron, I know this weekend you were looking forward to a lot of man on man on man action.
Leslie: I saw a quail. Sorry, man. You snooze, you lose!
Leslie: Bula-bula-bula!
Ann: Bula-bula-bula!
Leslie: I think this is going to be a really good bonding sesh for me and Ron. Guys love it when you can show them you’re better than they are at something they love.
Andy: Hey, check this out. I am on hold, with the State Parks Department. I am on hold, so suck on my butt.
Andy: How come he gets to do all the things I want to do. Go hunting. Ann.
April: Maybe a deer will eat him.
Andy (laughs): That would be really awesome. But I don’t think that’ll happen. Probably.
Leslie: You surprised that my breasts didn’t throw my aim off?
Ron: Let’s split up. I do better alone.
Leslie: Yeah you do. See? Just one of the guys.
Tom: You’re favorite kind of cake can’t be birthday cake. That’s like saying you’re favorite kind of cereal is breakfast cereal.
Donna: Mmm. I love breakfast cereal.
Tom: Look, some kind of bird. Let’s kill it. You talkin’ to me, bitch?
Jerry: What were you aiming at?
Donna: Nothing.
Mark: And keeping one’s eyes open is always a good rule of thumb around guns.
Jerry: But this trip, it is the one time of year I get to pee standing up.
Ron: Someone shot me in the head.
Leslie: Bula-bula-bula?
Leslie: Ron, I got your hat. Ron, I have your hat.
Ron: I’m just going to stay angry. I find that relaxes me.
Donna: Someone shot my car!
Ron: When I look at my palm I see a lady’s mouth French kissing a dog. Is that normal?
Ann: Well, the pain medication I gave you is pretty strong. Donna uses it for menstrual cramps.
Tom: Is he OK? Is he going to live?
Leslie: I think so. Although I am hoping that he has some memory loss.
Tom: On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how pissed is he?
Leslie: Come on, person who shot Ron. Look I think it’s a little weird that nobody wants to admit that they shot Ron in the head.
Tom: Maybe Ron shot himself.
Leslie: Mmm, he has seemed really depressed lately.
Mark: He was shot in the back of the head.
Leslie: You’re right. He loves the back of his head. He would never shoot himself there.
Tom: Man is the most dangerous game.
Donna: To the Predator.
Tom: I did smell something out there. And it wasn’t human.
Leslie: That was pine trees.
Donna: The Predator can see heat.
Tom: We should cover ourselves in mud. It could still be out there.
Andy: I’ve lived in Pawnee my whole life. That is a fact. A fact about me.
Leslie: Hey, how is he?
Ann: He’s pretty out of it. He’s talking about you in his sleep.
Leslie: Good stuff?
Ann: No.
Leslie: Oh.
Leslie: I let my emotions get the best of me. I just I cared too much I guess. I was thinking with my lady parts. I was walking and I felt something icky. I thought there was going to be chocolate. I don’t ever remember. I’m wearing a new bra and it closes in the front so it popped open and it through me off. All I want to do is have babies. Are you single? I’m just, like, going through a thing right now. I guess when my life is incomplete I want to shoot someone. This would not happen if I had a penis. What? Bitches be crazy. I’m good at tolerating pain. I’m bad at math and I’m stupid.
April: What do you think they’re doing right now?
Andy: Probably making out on top of a deer carcus. Super romantic.
April: I gave my gay boyfriend’s boyfriend a hicky and it totally made my gay boyfriend jealous.
Ron: You know, Leslie, the Super Bowl’s in a couple months. I usually watch it with my brothers. Maybe you could come by at halftime and shoot me in the head.
Leslie: Look, if there’s anything I can do to make it up to you.
Ron: Sure, how about you shoot me in the head. Oh wait, you already did that.
Tom: Ann, whoa, are we finally going to do this?
Ron: I’m sorry I lost my temper before. It was ’cause I was shot in the head by a moron.
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Tags: Daniel J. Goor, Greg Daniels
